View Quote Happy Man: Welcome to Hollywood! What's your dream? Everybody comes here; this is Hollywood, land of dreams. Some dreams come true, some don't; but keep on dreamin' - this is Hollywood. Always time to dream, so keep on dreamin'.
View Quote Magician at party: No matter what they say, it's all about money. So let's imagine, ladies, that you're a savings and loan officer. Watch - one, two, three; see, you've got it all, and we've got nothing. You've got all four, take a look.
View Quote Philip Stuckey: [about Morse] He mortgaged everything he owns, right down to his underwear, to secure a loan from the bank.
View Quote
Impossible relationships. My special gift is impossible relationships.
View Quote Bridget: Now, I'm sure we're gonna find something here that your uncle would love.
Vivian: Bridg? He's not really my uncle.
Bridget: They never are, dear.
View Quote Edward: Any questions?
Vivian: Can I call you Eddie?
Edward: Not if you expect me to answer.
Vivian: I would have stayed for two thousand.
Edward: I would have paid four. I'll see ya tonight.
Vivian: Baby, I'm gonna treat you so nice, you're never gonna wanna let me go.
Edward: Three thousand, for six days, and Vivian, I will let you go.
View Quote Edward: I guess this is not the greatest time to be a hooker, is it?
Vivian: Look, I use condoms always. I get checked out once a month at the free clinic. Not only am I better in the sack than an amateur, I am probably safer.
Edward: I like that; that's very good. You should have that printed on your business card.
Vivian: If you're makin' fun of me, I don't like it.
Edward: [laughs] No, I'm not making fun of you. No, I don't. I'm not. I wouldn't offend you. I'm sorry. What's your name?
Vivian: What do you want it to be?
View Quote Edward: I hadn't exactly planned this.
Vivian: Do you plan everything?
Edward: Always.
Vivian: Yeah me too! I'm actually, no I'm not a planner. I would say I'm a kinda fly by the seat of your pants gal, you know moment to moment. Yeah that's me, that's...yeah.
View Quote Edward: I was very angry with him. It cost me ten thousand dollars in therapy to say that sentence: "I was very angry him." I do it very well, don't I? I'll say it again: I was very angry with him. "Hello, my name is Mr. Lewis, I am very angry with my father."
Vivian: I would've been angry at the ten thousand dollars.
. . .
Vivian: Did I mention... my leg is 44 inches from hip to toe, so basically, we're talkin' about...
[She wraps her legs around Edward.]
Vivian: ... 88 inches of therapy... wrapped around you, for the bargain price of...
Edward, Vivian: [in unison] ... three thousand dollars!
View Quote Edward: I will pay you to be at my beck and call.
Vivian: Look, I'd love to be your beck-and-call girl, but...
View Quote Edward: Oh, by the way, Phil — about your car...
Philip Stuckey: Oh God. What?
Edward: It corners like it's on rails.
Philip Stuckey: What?! What does that mean? Edward... Edward...
[Grinning, Edward hangs up.]
View Quote Edward: So what happened after he climbed up the tower and rescued her?
Vivian: She rescues him right back.
View Quote Edward: Tell me, what kind of... what kind of money you girls make these days? Ballpark.
Vivian: Can't take less than a hundred dollars.
Edward: Hundred dollars a night?
Vivian: For an hour.
Edward: An hour? You make a hundred dollars an hour and you got a safety pin holding your boot up? You gotta be joking.
Vivian: I never joke about money.
Edward: Neither do I.
[He turns to her.]
Edward: Hundred dollars a hour. Pretty stiff.
[She reaches over into his lap.]
Vivian: Well, no... but it's got potential.
View Quote Edward: When you and I were dating, did you speak to my secretary more than you spoke to me?
Susan: She was one of my bridesmaids.
View Quote Edward: You see this young lady over here?
Hollister: Yes.
Edward: Do you have anything in this shop as beautiful as she is?
Hollister: Oh, yes.
[Edward gives Hollister a look.]
Hollister: Oh, no! No, no! No. I'm saying we have many things as beautiful as she... would want them to be! [babbling] That's the point I was getting at. And I think we can all agree with that. That's why, when you came in here, you knew from the first—
Edward: You know what we're gonna need here? We're going to need a few more people helping us out. I'll tell you why. We are going to be spending an obscene amount of money in here. So we're going to need a lot more help sucking up to us, 'cause that's what we really like.
Hollister: Ohhhh!
Edward: You understand that.
Hollister: Sir, if I may say so, you're in the right store, and the right city, for that matter!
